i heard kissing is good for u so how about we both try to stay healthy huh
what if every time u unzipped your pants it made the skype opening sound effect
if anyone ever calls you a slut just say ‘and yet i still won’t fuck you’ and then blow them a kiss as you saunter away because that’s the closest they’re ever gonna get to your magnificence, o smaug, chiefest and greatest of calamaties
Ladies real talk
*pounds on ur windshield as u hide inside ur car with doors locked*
seriously? are you kidding me?
That is a CHILD. Have some fucking decency.
*pops your tires w/ my strong front teeth and goes for the kill*
no mom i already have a job its called being hardcore